Silence - a ghostly poem I just wrote any comments welcome?

Question

Silence

Go nowhere tonight
A ghostly murmur said
In a hushed voice
Listening to your faint beating heart
Beckoning come
Sleep silent
Dreamy eyes
Enjoy! Whispers, you will not awake

Thunder roared
Lightning strikes
Dark clouds
The night sky
Rain came pouring down
Heavily against the window pains
Left ajar to let in fresh air

Twisting creeping ivy now
Stretched out in all directions
Up and around your four poster bed
Circulating your legs, your arms
Like elongated fingers
Around your pretty head
A garland for a crown

3 hungry cats follow
Their claws sharp as needles
Clawing and looking for a way in
From out on the walls they came

Thunder roared
Lightning strikes
Screams in the night
No one will hear your call
Hush silence sleep tight

Answer 1

Yes sometimes they force me down into sleep too. One of your best poems! Great work and differently themed than previous verses you have posted that I have read. Much more emotive quality with fear predominant, serious and unsettling.

Answer 2

Just one thing to change. It should be 'Circling your legs, your arms.'

Circulating means distributing, like a newspaper.

Good, atmospheric, creepy stuff.

Answer 3

Very good, paints quite a vivid picture

Answer 4

Scary and Stephen Kingish...

Answer 5

wow you're really talented, you should keep it up. I wish i could write poetry like this, amazing.