"If Spiders Had Tails" please, would you comment upon a meander ad-lib. and c/c?

Question

"The balance of the mooniverse
would surely be disrupted
And quails and aliens all confused
If spiders had tails.

You and I
(that`s thee and me,
and the amusing-yourselves here nobblity)
Would find ourselves in
a heck of a snit-pickle is spiders had tails.

"Why" you might well ask,
or otherwise you would not
( I get bored myself
And ain`t yet been beamed up)..

Well, it`s all a finite balance
upon which we (variably, admittedly) rely
Yet,if spiders had tails, these days, things being odder-than -of-yore,
They`d have to hike them in a valance.

If they had tails,
they`d get caught in thir webs
and like scorpions who are innately envious of all they cannot sting
they`d top themselves.

That, my deahs, would never,.... evvah, do -
Let Me Tell You!
It`d weigh them down, all mightily
and the Spider-quack`s fees would rise something sprightky
for anti-depressants for ante-tail arachnids and pharmaceutically corporate bids!

No more being ` able to afford
Six pairs of jimmy chooses no no no!
Invisible-making quackry potions and lotions
Cosmetic removals and www disappprovals.- and only money for boots.

Besides which, holism being what it can now prove
Flies would be jivin` and boppin` and riffin` in the grooves made by lagging tails
and who said no-one should tell any spider tales?
Wails would tail-wailed, be amidst the blue-bottle riff-raff - nope, flies, done or undone.
Must NOT have The Last Laugh! So, black widdoze or no, no more spider tails - Got That?"



This ambiguity is to celebrate the greater calibre of prose of a friend - whose
GORGEOUS stilettos are Famous - and best outta the back cos she is my friend,
and only hurls darts inself-defence. No flies on us, I vote for a web-sequin-part-with-tarties.
Top-hats and Tales -eat yer hearts out LOL :D Let`s Party! (no drugs sorry, tales get carried).

Answer 1

thought i got lost,

there at the end,

but, then i realized-

i had started off

that way

and your poem

is Not-to-Blame-at-All..



..so, ambiguous,

yes, and pleasant.



..'done',

i say well.

];)



edit- oh,

i've just noticed your poem makes

for wonderfully crazy

country

music lyrics.

Answer 2

I got to the end and then realised why you'd written this (there was a hint in the word "spider").



I like your spider, all the way down to S5. The rest is fun, but of limited audience appeal. I think there is good merit in your intent though - written with a good heart.



As I read it, I wondered whether tails needed spiders too.



Since I lack a prehensile tail I cannot easily answer this question, but I wonder whether my tail lives a life amidst some spiders web, wishing I didn't have the genetic effrontery to not require it. I can picture it there, sulking and grumpy with me, hanging out with flies.



This is such a peculiar image and I love reaching such absurd locations with my thoughts.



Thank you :)

Answer 3

I am quite sure that if they do have tails my tale has hidden them very well, and Francine, well she is a pretty chic petite fatale feminine...

and to know her is to

fall in love with

well when I was a child I would hold them in my hand

one day

one bit me on my foot

to say nothing about the first dratted tick I saw it tickled crawling up my arm

and when it would not squish I raised a cry of shrill alarm



need less to say

I got lymed along the way

and they say it's here to stay so

many headaches now keep me at bay



so when a prick picks up on me and rheams me over needlessly

I scream



okay>???



now back to the tails

I detest scorpions two did a tapdance across my back

under my house coat

their tails whipping wildeishly

and I was scared to go to sleep and now

those silly girls tell me

they want to keep as pets, they're cute???

say what??? they're not

and hon

your lines do not help my head

although the laughter

clearly fed to me

from them

... but lets pretend



lets try to write them neat for me

moi. ask you please

and prettily



enjoy the book,

...

and thank you for this poem

Answer 4

It makes me very unhappy too, in easy of lots of the failings you have put in my solutions, making your self no longer know me because you appeared to at one time? My Lord, somebody has been telling you stuff i think yet are you using your severe thinking skills? No. you have under no circumstances even come splendid to ME with those issues, quite who prefer elusive and diffused insults against me. Why? i'm in basic terms like a number of different man or woman interior the universe, shaky floor i attempt to stroll on whilst coping with strangers in an emotionally binding person-friendly activity like poetry...do no longer bypass. seek advice from me. ok? Please?

Answer 5

OMG I never saw so many hilarious words. The poem needs work on syllable flow.

Answer 6

I'm quite fond of stillettoed spiders mice elf!